It Doesn't Go Away.

You can't save them all, neither can you let them all vanish.

 When it happens to you who will be there to pick you up right again.

You seek the truths of ancient time questions, well you aren't the first one.

It's said that love can conquer all, but can it fix these fears?

 Can I let you love me for more than a night?

Shit gets real when you're alone on the floor in a dark room.

 With only the eyes of God and demons looking upon me.

I disappoint you every time, and every time I think, "why is my life such a reflection of you"?

 I sit there and ponder the worth of my love to you, I wonder if I'm just wasting my time here.

Trivial things cross my mind, and that little light goes away.

You spent your whole life breaking down all that I built up.

I've been trying for years not to fall into an early grave, but you kept pushing me down deeper.

I doubt that in ten years I'll be bumming on the streets, or that I'll be amounting to nothing like you thought.

Even if I can't get my own the first time around I know someone else will have my back even if it isn't you.

I waste a lot of tears on you when it's obvious I'll always be hurting.

I sit there and realize this and wonder why I can still love you... you that brought me into this world and have almost taken me out a few times.

I learned to find comfort in the pain, I'm always ready to hurt, always ready to miss someone, always ready to die.

Cause that's when you're there for me, when it's time to hurt me again. 

I'm the living queen of darkness and I can't be found.

You see the scars on my being are just a light representation of the scars on my heart.

I'm so hurt and it can't be helped until I do something to help.

But how do you paddle upstream?

How do you defy gravity?

How do you work through the pain?